Who am i

Hi, I’m Pascale Britte (aka Lizzie).

Lately i’ve lost sight of who i really am, so i’m gonna write down the pieces that describe who am i.

I love studying, i’ve always been workaholic.

My dream is to learn Japanese and hopefully live in Japan.

I don’t think i really have any friends at the moment.

I love painting, but my skills are pretty bad.

My favourite band is Cavetown.

I love Japanese street fashion.

I’m the type that isn’t harsh but isn’t nice either.I’m the type that doesn’t care, or i haven’t found right people to care about.

I love chameleons.

I still have a crush on a boy who was crying one year ago, i’ve been struggling to talk to him ever since.

I still have no idea who i am.

 

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Life is NOT fun

Basically, here are lists of things that are happening to me right now.

  1. I’m sick, i kept vomitting for 5hours last night, now i have a bellyache and i missed a class!
  2. Exams are coming up, i have no idea how to study.
  3. I have 2 quizs coming up tomorrow and once again i have no idea how to deal with it.
  4. I have road trip on sunday, but i won’t be able to eat anything, since IM SICK!
  5. I’m transferring school.
  6. I lost my pencils so i’m not able to draw.

But THERE ARE STILL SOME STUFF THAT MAKE ME HAPPY!

harry styles new album and CAVETOWN

 

GOD BLESS CAVETOWN.

 

I’m tired

Song of the day: Sorry by Halsey

I’ve always been a person who LOVED studying, this sounds weird, but i felt good when i knew i was going to learn something new. But now, as i said i’m losing myself. I can’t bring myself to study, but i really have to. what to do??

Exams are coming up, i’m confused and i’m dying

 

Hello, i haven’t been there lately, maybe because i haven’t been myself lately or i thought i’ve been myself but in reality i’ve been avoiding the reality of my loneliness.Everyone has their own problems, i know that, i always try to help but why do i still feel lonely. Maybe because they aren’t my problems, they are problems which i created so i could see if i could get help and whenever i tried to speak my mind, they reply with this ignorant voice which creeps me every night, when im alone with myself and i can finally see the real me and my real problems, which i can’t solve, because i’m alone.

Exams are coming up, i know i’ll survive them, i know the day will come when i lay in bed knowing that i can rest for 3 months and not worry about exams, BUT when will that day come? i have to get there somehow, don’t it? but i’m stuck here with millions of other problems yet i spend my time solving other peoples problems because somehow they are the only ones who have struggles and they are the only ones who seek help.

What about me?

Who asks about my problems, besides my mom (best person, by the way)?

So, because of that i’m thinking of changing school. I want to have another chance to really express myself and not have someone question me “is this you? talk to me when you get to your NORMAL self?”. Maybe this is my normal self, who overthinks all the time but doesn’t have anyone who can calm down those thoughts.

Why don’t i spend my time with friends, huh? BECAUSE maybe i do want to go outside, i just don’t wanna go with them. So please, can you understand that?

If everything goes as planned, i’m changing school, that’s decided.

So, here i am, future me are you proud of me?

guess not, i hope you’re in better place.

farewell.

My First Blog – Feeling Left Out

Hello everyone!

This is my first blog. I have no idea what am i doing. But let’s try!

You miss all the shots you don’t take.

So, the main thing i wanna talk about is feeling left out. Which is ABSOLUTELY terrible. I have 2 internet friends, i can’t really tell if im the 3rd friend, eh. Well, everytime they plan something, i don’t know anything. They tag each other everywhere.I don’t see myself there either and everytime i say something.. They ignore it.It seems like i just here but i’m ¬†invisible? i felt the same way in school.

 

I’m that friend who has to walk behind the group when the path isn’t big enough. I’m that friend who gets left behind when i asked them to wait for me. I’m that friend who doesn’t get invited to hang out. You just slowly see yourself become less important ¬†and everything just hurts.

SO

I’m gonna cross the line.

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